StormWarning’s Counterterrorism

It’s the day after Fathers Day. Maybe people are tired of the Tim Russert story; maybe a few heartless souls could see his son Luke on the Today Show this morning and not be drawn to the emotion of the moment.  Ask, however, this question of yourself.  Have you a good or bad relationship with your Dad?  And what about the relationship that you have with your son?

Life tends to play horrible tricks on you. When you least expect it, your Dad is gone, perhaps suddenly, or maybe after a long drawn out illness like my Dad experienced. But suddenly, it becomes “your time” and you are no longer there…either for your son, or daughter, or your Dad is no longer there for you.

My own relationship with my father was no where near the long and loving relationship that apparently Tim Russert had with his Dad (”Big Russ”) or with his son Luke; it was not like the relationship we know that a man named Tiger Woods had with his Dad (yes, perhaps that Tiger’s Dad, Earl, was the ultimate of the overbearing “stage fathers” - but maybe, just maybe, the inner strength that Earl instilled in his son left Tiger with that air of invincibility and belief that anything was possible). Mine was conflicted.

I was able to reconcile with my father about a decade before he died a few years ago. And I learned through the all too long period of conflict that he and I experienced, that I had to avoid at all costs the same with my own son. Today, my son and I are close. He confides in me, and yet, often just calls to “shoot the shit.” Maybe most importantly, people I do not even know have told me in different ways how good a young man my son has grown to be (I should not exclude from my “kvelling” that my daughter is also quite the young lady). When a stranger tells you that your son (or daughter) is honest, hard working, a “good person,” how much more could a parent ask?

I can only say…”to love your parents with all of your heart and soul…spend as much time with them as you can while they are healthy as if today could be their last day…remember the good times they and you have had when they begin to fade…and spend your last times with them as quality time, regardless of their condition…”

It’s the day after Fathers Day. Make the most of the next year and work toward having the kind of relationship with your son or daughter, or with your father if you are lucky enough that he is still alive, that is ever-lasting. 

fathers and sons